Clean Break

Notes to Self:

• The best motivation for cleaning the house is to invite an insanely neat and organized, "germ-aware" OCD sister-in-law over for son's third birthday party.

• The house is disgusting - how did I not know this until I scrubbed one tiny corner of the kitchen and saw the comparison?

• How do I LIVE?

• Frantically scrubbing my house the night before my son's birthday celebration within the first week of a low-carb, no sugar crash diet which has depleted my energy AND possibly made me feel more than a little homicidal was probably not the best idea.

• The spontaneous beginning of the exercise program two days ago which has made me feel like tangible "splut" was also not the greatest of ideas.

• I really need to think things out more thoroughly.

• It seems I'll do ANYthing to lose a few pounds when it comes to an imminent weekend of swimming with skinny chicks.

• Find friends who aren't so skinny and swim with THEM.  

• Go to the mountains with the skinny chicks.  In the middle of winter.

• Never scrub under the vegetable drawers in the refrigerator again.  Never.  It's just too terrifying.  Have the kids do it.  Tell them aliens have left a surprise ... just for them.

• Buy stock in Magic Erasers, Shamwows and old toothbrushes.  I haven't really found anything else I need.

• Decide which rooms are most important to scrub in detail . . . and bar the rest from entry during the party.

• Buy "crime scene" tape for doorways.

• Give up and relax and ENJOY the little guy's big day.

• And rejoice over the return tonight of a furry little loved one after she was missing for weeks.  Somehow, I don't even mind how dirty the floor is when I see that SHE is again sitting on it.